At the start of the year, I find it helpful to remind myself why I am choosing to homeschool. I tend to doubt our decision every once in a while, sometimes I doubt my own ability to teach, sometimes I worry about social aspects, sometimes I'm just lazy and the thought of getting it all together is just overwhelming. This year I really decided to step it up and commit myself to this journey seeing that Zander is getting ready to start kindergarten. Please understand this is really more for me, so that when I have a bad day at school, I can look back and remind myself why we're doing this. (Disclaimer: I understand everyone has their own reasons for their schooling choices, these are OUR reasons for homeschooling, please keep comments respectful.)
1. God. This is the number one reason: I am called. Really I could stop here. I remember being in college going from elementary school to elementary school, studying to be a TEACHER. I couldn't help but notice all the BAD about it. Needless to say, I stopped trying to be a public school teacher and am now the main teacher to my sweet babies. I just realized I can do what the teachers were doing...just at home...no interference from big bad government...or other parents and others parents children.
So starting with the Word, though I tried to deny it at first, I believe the bible lays it out plainly for me. Ephesians 6:4 states: "Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord." Deut. 4:9 says "Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them slip from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them." Proverbs 1:7 "The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge." Deut. 6:5-7 says "Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up."
This last one stuck with me because I wondered to myself, how am I to teach my children when we sit at home, when we walk along the road, when we lie down and when we get up if they are gone all day long? How can I hide God's word in their heart if most of the opportunities happen when they are at school? How can I truly impress upon their hearts if I only see them at dinner and at bedtime?
2 Cor 10:5 says "...bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ" How can I make sure they learn to bring every thought captive to Christ if they are spending 80% of their day with someone else?
Isaiah 38:9 "The father to the children shall make known thy truth"
Luke 6:40 states "A student is not above his teacher, but everyone who is fully trained will be like his teacher." Which teacher do I want them to be like?
And finally, Romans 12:2 "And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God." I had to let go of preconceived notions of what I thought homeschooling looked like and realize that I do not answer to this world, but to Christ.
The Message states it this way: "So here's what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for Him. Don't become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what He wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you." Again, it came down to time: how can I teach my kids if they are not with me during the everyday ordinary comings and goings?
2. Opportunity: The opportunities for spiritual, character, academic, social, and family time when homeschooling are AWESOME! I truly believe the traditional American family is disintegrating. Its too easy to get caught up in the business of this world, running from one activity to the next ... or whatever takes up our time...(blogging, LOL!) We can become so busy running around we forget to actually spend time together. Homeschooling affords our family the precious commodity of time. Time spent together, and frankly that's really what our kids want from us, our time. It breaks my heart when I hear people say they can't wait for school to start again, as if their kids are burdens. I sometimes feel that if my kids were in school I could get so much done! But I'm quickly reminded that 'me time' isn't in the Bible, well it is, its just referred to as 'selfishness'. Then I am reminded how quickly time passes, and how few years we have our children with us before they move on to their own lives. If the average person lives say 85 years, then the 18 years our kids spend with us is less than 1/4 of their lives. I don't want to look back and think I didn't spend enough time with them, and 3 hours a day just isn't enough for me.
3. Academically speaking homeschoolers typically rate 37 percentage points higher than public school students. The average homeschool 8th grade student performs four grade levels above the national average (Rudner study). At home, I can make sure we have mastery of subjects, go at the right pace for each child, have one-on-one (not one-on-twenty) teaching, and I can tailor my curriculum to their needs.
4. Social: So that leaves me with my social reservations. I still struggle with the idea of this sometimes, and we have debated it over and over. I think I misunderstand the word socialization as that the notion that spending time with 30 other 6 year olds is in some way 'socializing' my child. I read in an article by Manfred B Zysk this comment: "Go to your local middle school, junior high, or high school, walk down the hallways, and tell me which behavior you see that you think our son should emulate." LOL! I looked up the word 'socialization' and found some disturbing things. I do not want to 'convert or adapt my children to the needs of society'. I do want them to be able to function in our society, but that does not mean they need to be assimilated into society like the Borg. We are in this world, but not of this world.
I do think they need to spend time with friends, and we have committed to making sure out kids are involved in enough 'outside the home' activities like sports, dance, church, and homeschooling co-ops that we are confident that the amount of time our kids spend with others their same age is appropriate. Not to many activities though, we still focus on our family time as a priority.
Considering my opinion means nothing, we have to ask ourselves what the bible says about socialization?
Proverbs 22: 24-25 "Do not make friends with the hot-tempered, do not associate with those who are easily angered; or you may learn their ways and get yourself ensnared."
1 Cor 15:33 Do not be mislead: "bad company corrupts good character."
5. Our Goals: We asked ourselves "What do we want our children to look like when they've finished their formal education? In Luke 2:52 it says "And Jesus grew in wisdom and in stature, and in favor with God and men." We want them to learn to trust in the Word of God, to have it hidden in their heart. We want to train them in the way they should go, so it may go well with them. We want them to be healthy, confident, and to know they are beautifully and wonderfully made. We want them to keep their childlike faith, and we want them to be a light in this world. We want them to "always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks [them] to give the reason for the hope that [they] have. But do this with gentleness and respect." (1 Pet 3:15) We want them to be confident, to have good manners, to be compassionate, to be respectful, and to be humble in spirit.
That's a tall order for a teacher, and frankly I'm not sure they'd be able to comply at our local school. Honestly, I'm not sure I can do it either, but I'd rather trust God to work through us than leave it up to a stranger.
Lastly, and on a more selfish note, we can protect their innocence a tad longer. We don't have to deal with peer pressure, my kids haven't watched Harry Potter, they still like Clifford and Curious George. They don't beg me for a wii or an iphone. We don't have to worry about car-pool, unhealthy lunches, or bad teachers. And my personal favorite, we don't have to get up at 6am everyday to get out of the house for school! (This alone is enough to keep me homeschooling!)
I just wanted to get this out in typed form for all of you who question my motives. I am a lot like Moses...he was never a good speaker (except when God got involved) I really can't say all of this when someone asks "why do you homeschool"...they usually just ask and then zone out. ANYWAYS...just wanted to get it all out so I can redirect them to this blog (lol).
Well that's it, my ridiculously long blog post about why we made this crazy commitment.
My definition of frugal fun has a lot to do with contentment.
I’ll start by describing what frugal is not. Frugal in my mind is not the same as being cheap. Frugal is different from never wanting to spend money. Frugal does not always mean looking for the cheapest way to do something. At our house, we often choose to spend more money on something that is higher quality and will last longer.
My definition of frugal is making intentional decisions with money based on what would most honor God. That will often look different for each family. It’s not wrong to spend money on things that are fun, and every family will have fun things that they want to invest in.
However, the Bible does give us some specifics regarding money (this is not an exhaustive list):
- We are to be free from the love of money and from greed. (1 Timothy 6:10-11)
- We are not to worry about having too little money or provisions. It’s interesting to note that in this passage, Jesus says that when we worry about not having enough, we are actually serving money rather than serving God! (Matthew 6:24-25)
- We are commanded many times to give, one example being in 2 Corinthians 9:6-7
Which brings me to the most important aspect of being frugal: realizing that even when one has an abundance, life does not consist of possessions! (Luke 12:15)
Our children can be pretty vocal on this one! Sometimes my boys are pretty sure that they will never be happy again if they don’t have a particular item! They are also tempted to compare our family to other families who are able to spend more. I wish I could say that as adults, we have moved beyond that, but unfortunately, our sinful hearts are tempted in the same way!
Last week, we had an evening where I really wanted to eat dinner out, but my husband needed to mow lawns and we didn’t have the money to spend anyway. When things like this come up, there are two options: Feel sorry for myself, or realize that happiness does not consist of eating out! If we have a lousy evening at home, it’s not because we didn’t have the money to do what we wanted. It’s because we chose to have bad attitudes.
I want to use this blog to encourage you that people who do not spend a lot of money do not need to be boring people! Children who are not given lots of toys do not need to have a dreary childhood!
So that’s my definition of frugal fun. Being content with what God supplies, and choosing to enjoy the things that He has given us.
James 1:17 “Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shifting shadow.”